The odd thing called "memory"..

1:14 pm

--> Of my list of the most absolute favorite movies, A Moment To Remember definitely comes in the top 5. I am a sucker for good romance stories and this film is an embodiment of that. But more on my views and reviews on the film later… I’m here to talk about memories right now. In A Moment To Remember, the female lead starts losing her memory one by one, the tragedy being that she forgets the love of her life. Of course, the love of her life, devastated as he is, tries to keep their memories alive for the both of them. There is a line in the movie that keeps coming more than once and it goes: When the memory dies, so does the person.

 A Moment To Remember has me crying a river every single time I see it. That is one happy couple and they don’t deserve that. When someone is happy, they should know and remember that they’re happy! 
There is this K-drama that I had really enjoyed watching, along with its tiny flaws (okay, fine, glaring you in the face flaws), mainly because THE Lee Min Ho was the lead, called Boys Over Flowers. It was immensely popular in South Korea when it came out in 2009, making instant stars out of Ku Hye Sun and the entire F4, especially Lee Min Ho. It was aired in a lot of countries outside of South Korea and well received there as well, but not in India, not that that stopped the die-hard fans (such as myself) from following and falling in love with the series.
--> The reason I talk about Boys Over Flowers is that in the very last episode, Goo Jun Pyo (ah, definitely one of my fav fictional characters till date…giggle!) meets with an accident and is critical for a while and all that but when he does wake up, he’s fine except that he doesn’t remember his girlfriend Guem Jan Di. Which wouldn’t have been such a big deal had the entire series not revolved around the true love and struggles in love of Jun Pyo and Jan Di. Anyways, I, like the F4 and Jan Di were shocked and vexed when Jun Pyo couldn’t remember her, fretting over their fate (he eventually does remember her…True Love is rewarded in all the K-dramas that I’ve watched till date, yay!). I remember reading a fan blog on that episode of Boys Over Flowers at that time. That post was written on the same date that finale episode was aired in South Korea, the internet was buzzing with the end of a series that had contributed so much in the Korean Wave. The blogger wrote about the part where Jun Pyo loses his memory and fails to remember only one person and I remember her critsising the plot saying that it was a fake disease.
--> And at that time, the only reason I didn’t like that comment was because of my loyalty towards Boys Over Flowers and anything that Lee Min Ho is associated with. But I never really did believe that this selective amnesia is a real thing and dismissed as a mere plot device. And I also remember thinking, oh well how convenient! If we could just happen to forget one thing or one event that pains us, or even person that even though we love truly, just is so difficult to keep loving. I had thought that. I wasn’t happy that he had forgotten her, I just wanted it for myself as a defense mechanism, just like I had wanted Son Ye Jin’s character’s Alziemer from A Moment To Remember.
--> I should clarify that never for a moment was I serious about wanting any of that. That was just me getting melodramatic and coping with the ongoing shit in my life, that’s all. I tend to do that. This is how I deal with stuff. I watch or read a lot of stuff and imagine myself in highly dramatic situations with the most bizarre and fantastical solutions and then when I’ve let out my steam, I am ready to deal with stuff practically.
A childhood friend of mine met with an accident sometime back. The accident was bad, as all accidents are, and she got hurt in her head which meddled with her memory. I’ve known her all my life and you cannot imagine how sad I was by this news, but she was in another city, far away and they only thing I could do for her were write to her over facebook, and pray. Anyway, she contacted me and while we were chatting, she told me that she remembers everything about her life except that she is married. Her marriage wasn’t a taxing event in her life, she had married the guy she loved and were, and are still, happy together. And after reassuring her that it’s okay, memories are tricky and they come back slowly but eventually, I thought about how that turn in the plot of Boys Over Flowers had got it right.
I had dismissed it then, thinking it silly and all. But the fact is that memories are important. And it is possible to lose them. Which is why so many of us cling to it so dearly. Little snippets of who we are, what we’ve been through, what we were. I think it reassures us in a way. I have torn down and burnt old diaries, some old photographs even, but I still remember primarily each thing that I’ve been through. It helps us grow. Otherwise we’d all be Peter Pan.

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