2:17 pm

There’s too much pain. Way too much pain to handle. Pain. Too much pain!

The only possible way of surviving, without losing ‘it’ (your sanity) is well, to let go of your story & enter someone else’s (I found the Twilight saga, of all things, a good companion in misery which made me laugh, cry & verbally abuse Jacob Black at the right moments).

But there’s so much pain. Every memory you had---happy ones included (for happy memory in the times gone by are more painful than the existing pain itself)---will just bring you down.

Do you know the feeling? You really want to cry. Badly. Howl your day through. But you don’t. Because you don’t have the time. Well, I don’t have the time. Nor do I have the energy. Crying & releasing yourself off that pain can be so time consuming that by the time you’re done, there’s a backlog to worry about!

Birthday tomorrow. Personally, I don’t think its such a good time for turning 20. And, unlike other 19-year-olds, its not even about biding farewell to your teenage years. Long time back, there was this fear, yes. But that was a long time back. Now, I would much rather be done away with the raging hormones. And acne (which I got at the age of 19!!).

Advice: If you’re 18, and have never had a single pimple till date, wait till you turn 19!

How did my friends stand it for years?

But yes, not a very nice time to turn 20.

Wish everyone a very happy Noel. Hope everyone I know & care about get everything they wish for and that they always wish for things and people they can get.

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